1) Eat First Thing
Skipping breakfast isn’t sexy. Be sure to eat within an hour of waking, and make it protein (best consumed in a protein shake). This will help sustain your blood sugar and get your energy back, rather than try to compensate for it on the back end of your day (p.s., this never works).
2) Do Your Exercise in Bursts
If you’re chasing your libido for endless miles on a treadmill, well, you’re running to stand still in more ways than one. Cut out the long-form cardio (which can actually trigger cortisol release, lowering much-needed progesterone and testosterone which calm your nerves and stoke your desire. Focus on bursts of exercise: Doing one minute really hard, two minutes easy, and repeating five times. This is a great way to boost testosterone.
3) Come to Your Senses
No, really. Tune in to all five. Get out of the gerbil wheel of to-dos and pay attention to what’s around you, what you hear, what the air smells like, what your salad really tastes like, how your sweater feels against your skin. Sex is undeniably a physical act, so unless you can tune in to the physical, it’ll be hard to feel sexy. Think about which sensory stimuli turns you on the most–how your partner smells, looks, and let that feed your own sensual fantasies, images, ideas. And allow it to stoke your sexual flame.
4) Be Here Now
A wandering mind is not your friend when it comes to sex. At the end of your workday or after dinner, write down all the things floating around your head competing for your attention, such as things you have to do, people to call, and so on. Clear it out of your brain for now. Then when you’re with your partner in an intimate setting (regardless of whether you’re going to have sex or not), practice tuning in to your partner and being mindful of him or her.
Give that person your full attention; let yourself be absorbed by their presence. You’re building a connection with that person, which is vital to feeling sexually connected.
5.) Sleep
Nothing in the world can replace sleep, and you need it to do anything—work, drive, read, think, talk, and yes, have sex. Being tired is one of the biggest reasons couples decline to get down and dirty. Lack of sleep is another physical stress that triggers cortisol, stress hormone release which reduces happy hormones like progesterone and testosterone—so be sure to get your 7 to 8 hours a night.
This post originally appeared over at
Entheos. Watch me share more about getting your sexy back
here.